Stop and think for a second. Who do you know that needs to say NO to something in their lives? Do you know someone who spends too much, lies too much, eats too much, or is a computer vampire and needs to stop? How about someone who needs to stop cheating, drinking, or taking pills? Would you like to help without them knowing who you are? You’ll soon be able to! In this day and age where every move we make is tracked by our cell phones, email, or hp address, communicating anonymously can be a great thing!

Sometimes the hardest thing to do is to see the things that we need to change in our own lives. Those things that cause us problems or that deter us from reaching a desirable goal. It is so easy to look at others and to instantly pinpoint their faults, weaknesses, or problems, but in our own lives we commonly become blinded by them. When someone you know starts trying to communicate with you about your faults, it becomes uncomfortable. It’s not easy to hear it from our closest friends. It may even hurt the friendship. Wouldn’t it be great to be able to tell someone you know changes they should make…anonymously!?

I know a girl who needs to stop criticizing people. She needs to say NO to criticizing and gossiping. All she does constantly is say bad things about others. Everyone knows that she is doing the same thing to them when not around. I’ve tried to be gentle with her and casually mention not to talk about others, or I’ll casually defend the other person and state that we don’t know the whole story etc. If I tell her directly to her face she will simply put up a defense and make excuses.

I know someone else who needs to stop eating. He needs to say NO to excess food. I understand being in perfect shape is unattainable for some, due to lifestyle, work, etc., but one thing we all can control for the most part is the quantity of food that we eat. If we are too heavy, we need to stop eating so much. Again, mentioning this to that person will only draw the typical response. ‘You are in such great shape you don’t understand,’ or ‘you just have good genes.’ They will instantly put up a defense and an excuse for why they are overweight and I’m not.

I know another person who needs to stop buying things for their kids. They need to tell their kids NO. Their rooms are so packed with stuff that there literally is no room for it all. There are bags and bags of clothes, shoes, and toys that have nowhere to go. There are piles of clothes that never are worn because there is just too many of them. If I gingerly mention this to them, I will undoubtedly get a cold shoulder and it might even ruin the friendship. I don’t think they even realize or think that it’s too much, and certainly aren’t aware of any negative side effects.

I know a man who needs to stop gambling. He needs to say NO to gambling. It is ruining his marriage, and his spending is crazy, and it is extremely unhealthy. Every time his best friend brings it up to him, his response is to pick right back at his friends’ life. This allows him to avoid facing his problem, typical defense mechanism.

I know a woman who needs to stop complaining about her life, and let go of some bitterness, a guy who needs to stop golfing so much, and a another guy who needs to stop being unfriendly to people in retail situations. They all need to learn to say NO. But if I tell all these people they need to stop, I will get criticized, verbally attacked, lose friends, and receive excuses!

Think about it again though. If I could anonymously spread these self-helps or observations, would it make it easier? Could it actually help some people? What if 4 people anonymously told them the same thing? They actually might realize they need the help! The ultimate goal is to help without putting them off, without hearing excuses, and without ending friendships. We need friends for this reason, and honestly it’s not a bad idea to hear what our ‘enemies’ may think as well. Sometimes the best criticism can come from some unlikely sources.

There will soon be a way to send someone a personal NO without them knowing who sent it! You’ll be able to send anyone you know a personal NO and you can choose to send it anonymously, or you don’t have to! It has been said by many…the best way to help yourself is to help others. Send someone a NO, and you just might help them clear an obstacle in their lives.

What if your best friend started liking someone that you absolutely knew something about, and knew that it would cause your friend problems at some point in the future? Wouldn’t it be great to tell him or her without them knowing who it came from? We know if you just mention something like that, the first response would be ‘well you’re just jealous’ or maybe ‘you like them too.’ Sometimes we truly mean well and truly want to help someone, but it’s just not in human nature to accept criticism easily.

Every New Years Eve many people take a look at their lives and be honest and open and decide to try and make changes. We should have a New Year Eve mindset throughout the year, think how much better our lives could become! How many areas in our life that would be deeply enriched if we just changed one tiny detail, or made one adjustment, learned to say NO to one tiny thing?

Think about who you can help today by sending them a personal NO! Whether it’s no to smoking, texting & driving, drinking, addiction, inactivity, fast food, bitterness, anger, coca-cola, too much TV, laziness, promiscuity, sleeping, prescription pills, the list goes on. Maybe you want to tell someone not to vote for a candidate, or to stop spending money, or pay more attention to their children.

We have been inundated with yes’s our whole lives, and we are in more debt than ever, the family unit is in the worst shape it’s ever been, people are on more prescription and illegal drugs than ever, and people are fatter than ever. It’s time to start saying NO. Marketers, corporations, and banks don’t want us to, but we know our lives will be better if we do. But since NO isn’t always easy, we need reminders and friends to help us say NO. NO brings focus, happiness, time, freedom, boundaries, & peace. When you receive a NO or send a NO, embrace it!

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